Subject: (OT) :) Fwd: Outsource Lawmaking to India Date: Thu, 2 Oct 2003 09:15:38 -0400 To: lpny_discussion From: Bob Armstrong --- Original Message --- From: "Ed Weinberg" To: Bob Armstrong Sent: 2 Oct 2003 03:58:02 -0000 Subject: Outsourcing news we're unlikely to see >=A0tzack wrote: >=A0Outsourcing news we're unlikely to see >=A0-------------------------------------- >=A0=A0Bush Lays Off Congress; Will Outsource Lawmaking to India > >=A0=A0By Jay Slupesky > >=A0=A0Washington - Citing the growing cost of running the Federal= government >=A0=A0and the need to cut costs in order to reduce the budget= deficit, >=A0=A0President Bush announced today that he was laying off all 535= members of >=A0=A0Congress and transferring lawmaking operations to a= legislative support >=A0=A0center in Bangalore, India. "Hey, outsourcing is the way to go= these >=A0=A0days," said Bush at an impromptu news conference where he= announced the >=A0=A0decision, adding, "the American people want to see less= government waste." > >=A0=A0Since every one of those ex-Congressmen had a salary of= $150,000, this >=A0=A0move will cut our costs by over $80 million per year, and= that's not even >=A0=A0counting what we'll save on health insurance and retirement= plans." >=A0=A0Sources indicate that the Indian replacements will be paid= approximately >=A0=A0$250 per month. > >=A0=A0The outcry from the newly laid-off Senators and= Representatives was >=A0=A0swift. Ex-California Senator Diane Feinstein said, "This is= absolutely >=A0=A0outrageous. How can a bunch of replacements over in India run= Congress? >=A0=A0What do they know about filibusters and committee hearings?"= As she was >=A0=A0being escorted out of the Hart Senate Office Building by U.S.= Capitol >=A0=A0Police officers, Feinstein complained that the= newly-terminated lawmakers >=A0=A0were only given ten minutes to clean out their desks and leave= the building. > >=A0=A0"I think it's a great idea," said Vice President Dick Cheney,= speaking >=A0=A0from a secure undisclosed location. "The American people were= fed up with >=A0=A0that expensive do-nothing Congress which didn't always give= the President >=A0=A0everything he asked for. Our new Indian replacements will be= much more >=A0=A0cooperative with the President, which is what we all want."= Asked whether >=A0=A0the outsourcing may be unconstitutional, Cheney noted, "That's= up to the >=A0=A0Supreme Court to decide, but as you know, they usually see= things our way." > >=A0=A0The new members of Congress seem thrilled with the attention= they are >=A0=A0receiving. Speaking from the offices of All-India Legislative= Support >=A0=A0Centre Ltd. in Bangalore, new Mississippi Senator Ramchandra= Shektar >=A0=A0Gupta told reporters, "The Indian people are very hard working= and we >=A0=A0will do our best as U.S. Congressmen and Congresswomen. And we= are going >=A0=A0to have some fun too. Just think: we have $2 trillion of the= American >=A0=A0taxpayers' money to spend!" > >=A0=A0Copyright (C) 2003 Jay Slupesky --=A0 =A0Bob Armstrong -- http://CoSy.com -- 212-285-1864 Return our Right to Relax : =A0http://ny.lp.org/cgi-bin/petition.cgi?Against_the_Smoking_Ban Computing Environment : =A0http://CoSy/CoSy/ A WTC vision : http://CoSy.com/CoSy/ConicAllConnect/ Liberty : http://CoSy.com/Liberty.htm =A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A0=A02003/10/02 9:14:21 AM